So I just now came across a link to this article on Pinterest. I gotta confess, I have completely given up altogether on being involved in womens’ ministries of any kind. My reason is because I’m always, always, ALWAYS the outsider there. I’m in my mid-30’s, I have Asperger’s, never married, no kids, I don’t wear makeup, I don’t fancy my hair up, I can’t afford nice clothing so I dress kinda scruffily but completely clean, I live alone, and I work for a living. I’m basically the exact opposite of every woman that has ever attended the same womens’ ministry event as I did.
What ends up happening is that I’m sitting there by myself, surrounded by strangers who are either mothers talking about their kids or barely-20-somethings talking about boyfriends, fashion, hair and makeup, music I’ve never heard of, or TV shows I’ve never seen, and they’re all getting emotional and teary-eyed over every little thing while I’m just not feeling it… if you’re not familiar with Asperger’s, intense displays of emotion from people around me basically “don’t compute” and throw me clean off… and the whole situation becomes scary awkward for me. Being in a crowd of people and socializing is already a massive challenge for me to begin with, and when I can’t contribute to any of the conversations going on around me because I don’t know anything of what they’re talking about, and all I get from anyone else is a lot of strange, suspicious looks because I’m not talking, I end up trying to inconspicuously look around the room for the first and most discreet opportunity to run out the door ASAP. Then later on, I always find out that people thought I was weird and were afraid of me. Exactly what kind of ministry do I get, or get to do, in situation like that? The only thing that ever comes of it is that my already destroyed self-esteem gets broken down just a little bit more, and I wish I never went.
There aren’t many people like me on the planet… according to the last set of statistics I’ve heard about autism, for every 1 autistic person, there are 88 neuro-typical people, and there are 4x more autistic men than women, so I’m painfully, painfully outnumbered in the world… and for once in my life, I would so love to be able to get involved in a womens’ ministry that isn’t one big massive stereotypical girly-girl fluff-fest that jabs at every single solitary struggle I have and causes me to leave in pain rather than having found help or even been able to help someone else. I gotta confess, my hopes aren’t up, however I’ve been praying my heart out that God would destroy said stereotypes once and for all, and show women how to stop girly-girl socializing and start getting real with each other.